This is my first article in my blog. My first article's title will be '3 things i know to be true.'
3 things I know to be true is that walk with my mom, dance and my shopping habits.
I'm walk sith my mom almost everyday. P.M 6:40~P.M 8:10. I like to tell somebody about my life. I often talk to my mom at home. but when I walk with my mom, I fell more comfortable than at home. I can tell my grade, my school days, my agnoy.. Etc... My mom consoles me , and so I feel so relieved everytime when I walk with my mom.
Second thing is I've dance. Since I was very young, I like to dance,still now, when I turn on the music, I love to dance. when I dance, I can forget my agnoy and anything also I have 0- Stress!!!!!!!!!! How wonderful~!! After I dance, it helps me concentrate on my work. Dance is one of my friends, the best friend. Other people say to me " Are you going to be a dancer?" or "What is your future dream?".. I love to dance just for my hobby, but I don't want to work as a proffesional dancer or something. I just love dancing.
The last thing is that I really like to shop. I care much about my clothes and appearance. because maybe I'm in my puberty?? I guess so. I went to America last year, and there was a mall called 'Del Amo' and I bought many clothes in Abericrombie&Fitch, in Old Navy, especially in Justice. There were such nice and preTTy clothes, and my eye turned dizzy. Anyway, when I go to department stores or any other shops, I have to buy something. (even thought I know that si a bad habit ) so, my mom said " You have to buy something you need" but i think PRETTY CLOTHES are something that i need. Mom buys me clothes if she feels they are pretty. Anyway I will try to fix my bad habit.
This was my first article on my blog and hope you write many comments!!!~~~^^
Hi Seo Yeon:) I enjoyed your writing! There are some minor grammatical mistakes but we'll go over them some other time. One thing I want to mention is that it'd be better if you try to deal more with organization of your work when you are writing. Try to write an interesting intro and a neat conclusion, and balance the size of the body paragraphs. That would make your writing much better. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteAlso, don't forget to remove the word verification thing. Go to design-settings-posts and comments and pu "no" for word verification.
ReplyDeleteHi I'm your writing TA Sintae.
ReplyDeleteGood to see that you made your blog and posted a writing.
I like how you organized into paragraphs, but I think you can work on grammer. For example,
Second thing is I've dance.
should be changed to
Second thing is that I have danced.
Since you danced from when you are young, you would like to put it into past tence.
Thank you for sharing three things you know to be true. I enoyed reading your post. There are a few grammar points to practice like capitalization and comma use. Also, please put a space between paragrahps.
ReplyDeleteFor your writing style, try to add a more detailed conclusion. I hope you enjoy wrting more soon.